Ever have a time when you concoct a plan for your day and plow through it determined to see it to finality no. matter. what? Yes, well that’s what happened here. The other day I decided I wanted to check out a upscalish used clothing store I’d heard about and go to mass in the area beforehand. En route, Evie screamed, cried, and hollered all the way to mass which is actually uncharacteristic of her in the car. My foot pressed harder and harder on the gas pedal as my thoughts switched from, “We’re going to be late” to “I need to get her out of that seat STAT.” We made it mass in tact, and I said a prayer of thanks that we arrived just before the Gospel (I don’t set the bar very high). I passed the relatively full cry-room but thought, “Eh, she’ll be fine, and anyways I don’t want another kid to set her off.” So we joined in mass sitting in outermost region of pews when absolutely nothing happened and she started to let out a scream. Cue our exit from the church though a door that promptly locked behind us. I felt like I was wearing a sign that said, “First time mom: clueless as they come.” We finished most of mass in the vestibule (my shelter) and then headed on our semi-merry way for some retail therapy.

The store had some really nice clothing and shoes- for a teenager hanging out at Starbucks, not someone changing diapers and administering spoonfuls of rice cereal. The more I perused, the more I felt ancient! Twenty-something mom carrying a baby (mistakenly thought all stores provided carts),  browsing through clothing racks with stretchy pants and skimpy dresses with sizes like 0, 3, 5, 7 etc. So I left the store with nary a purchase. When I deposited Evie in her car seat I realized she had pulled a Cinderella and left one of her cute crib shoes in the store. My aching arms and deflated spirit convinced me it wasn’t worth it to charge back in the store on a hunt of the floor. To home we went, and regret going out I did.

But things are looking up. I took Evie to a bridal shower this past weekend and although she single-fistedly knocked my water over on the recipes everyone lovingly brought for the bride-to-be, she did let people hold her without wailing and gnashing her gums.